I posted last time about the breathing technique, Quantum Light Breath. I mentioned that I had found this effective in helping to clear suppressed emotions. This is very true, though my experience of using the technique has been much more remarkable than the above description suggests, so I thought I'd tell you a bit more about what happened.
The first few times I listened to the QLB audio, I found myself in tears. This may not sound like a pleasant way to spend an evening, but after decades of suppressing such emotions, it came as a welcome relief to me to express the feelings I'd been holding back for so long. In the days that followed, I found that my habitual anger - always ready to rear its head if the slightest thing went wrong - had magically disappeared, and the next time I did the QLB, I felt what I can only describe as 'light energy' flooding through the top of my head. It was as though in expressing - and so releasing - the emotions, a blockage had been cleared, allowing a connection with a source of light to be established. I could feel the energy flooding into me and see what appeared to be flashes of light through the closed lids of my eyes.
The following day was like heaven on earth. I found I had a persistent sense of peace and joy inside me, a feeling which coloured my interaction with everything around me. My impression was that this was how it might feel to be enlightened: to be in the world yet not of it, to be very much engaged in the events of my day, yet at the same time aware of a source of love which could sustain me against whatever I encountered. This experience lasted for round about forty-eight hours. On the third day, my connection to the source of joy became intermittent and then apparently dwindled away altogether. I've had flashes of it since, but things have pretty much returned to 'normal'. (Unfortunately!)
Over the years, I've had various similar experiences of altered states of consciousness - all achieved without the aid of drugs, I should make clear... Most of these have been for shorter periods of time, in most cases a few minutes, in others a few hours - sometimes spontaneously, sometimes in response to such events as meditating or attending a spiritual seminar - though on one occasion (after first receiving Deeksha), the experience was once again for about forty-eight hours, much of which time I spent sorting through the clutter in my study and throwing a large proportion of it into black bags, filled with a spontaneous impulse to lighten my load of worldly possessions.
On this latest occasion, with the Quantum Light Breath, the experience seemed somehow more stable. Part of me suspected it would fade away again, though as I was very much in the present moment, whether or not it would last was of no great concern to me. Perhaps for this reason, another part of me felt that the experience was here to stay: that this was how it would be for me from now on, and - more importantly perhaps - that this was how it could be for all humanity.
Much of the time, I am writing this blog about spirituality from the perspective of someone who is still trying to make sense of it all, who still seems to be on the outside looking in. Sometimes, I'm so steeped in the endless churnings of my mind that the ideas I'm writing about seem to bear as much relation to my everyday life as they do to the surface of Mars. So it's nice to get these reminders from time to time that these ideas are real, not some ridiculous pie in the sky - and the really good news is that if I can have such experiences, then so can everyone else. There's nothing special about me. There's nothing special about any of us. Or, to put it another way: we are all special, because we're all one, all part of a single entity which is everything that is, and all capable of experiencing that for ourselves. Naturally, I am exercising my mind as to how exactly to get that understanding, that knowing, back right now, but all it seems to take, when put at it simplest, is to be willing to let go and accept what is: to be willing to feel and let go of emotions instead of holding them fast, to be willing to let life unfold instead of trying to control it, to allow the universe to simply be. Because, let's face it, that's what's going to happen anyway, so we might as well save ourselves the pain of trying to stop it.
And the really, really good news is that how I was for those forty-eight hours felt great. I was still very much me, but the connection to joy which I felt seemed to take away the pain of being me. It was like everything was exactly the same but the sun had come out. Was this enlightenment then? I suspect it was only base camp on the foothills of enlightenment, but it would do very nicely for now, thanks very much.
If Sri Bhagavan (and numerous others) are right, this is what is in store for all humanity in the years ahead. All humanity, that is, not only those who behave in a specified way or eat the right foods or believe in a, b and c instead of x, y and z, but all of us. All humanity will be enlightened, and will have this connection to joy.
Or if others are right then perhaps this outcome is not assured and we will have to work for it: we will have to work to make it happen. If that is the case, this latest experience of mine has taught me that we need to do that. We need to work to achieve this change in consciousness for all humanity. Because if we could all be in that state of being of which I was given a brief taste, there would still be challenges for the human race, there would still be arguments, there would still be a lot of work to do to make the world the kind of place we all want to live in, but at least we would have a chance of making that happen. Because all the stuff that gets in the way: the anger, the hurt, the cruelty; all the violence, all the abuse, all the injustice; that great burden of sadness which afflicts the human race, would be lifted from our shoulders. In the presence of that connection to joy, such things could not survive. They would melt away like shards of ice in the sun.
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