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April 02, 2008



Congratulations on the Google ads!! :) Let me know how that works for you, ok? It's something I've been curious about (and I giggled at your comment in a previous post about the timing of your first paycheck....hopefully it will be HUGE! lol)

Simon, this is a wonderful wonderful series. When I think back over the course of my life....I can easily see how much harm, torment, and emotional pain I put myself through by simply not accepting WHAT IS. Even now, I struggle with it sometimes. For example, I struggle with not feeling the urge to "DO SOMETHING" to "CHANGE SOMETHING" that IS. Do you know what I mean? There's that point of acceptance where we have to be able to say, "OK..I created this total experience. I have feelings...good or bad...about this experience. It's all MINE." Once we do that, something definitely seems to shift.

My struggle comes in accepting anything that I judge to be "negative". For example, I spent most of last year trying to deny the fact that I still loved someone I was no longer with. Once I was willing to say, "OK...I'm not going to resist this any more. I'm done trying to ignore it, change it or bury it."...suddenly, a situation came up where I was FINALLY able to release it once and for all.

I am now free :)

THANKS for the inspiring post!

Alexys Fairfield

Hi Simon,
I find that unwanted emotions usually surface when disappointment meets expectation. As far as feeling negative emotions, we can learn from anything. Any experience we have is a springboard to spiritual freedom. Soon enough we learn that emotions are meaningless in the grand scheme of the spiritual world, but for now we can sleigh them with baby steps that lead us into ourselves.

Sue Ann Edwards

{{{simon}}} Good job!!!! The more we embrace, the more expanded we become. Unlike what dear {{alexys}} portends, our emotions are our spiritual link to our Intuition. Which I certainly Do understand where {{alexys}} is coming from. We run away from our feelings into our heads most of the time and it pleases our 'egos' to think of this as 'spiritual', when what it is is an expression of our lack in coping skills. Expectations are our ruin most of the time, for these expectations are driven by our Personality level, not our Soul.

{{Grace}}...you DESERVE someone who loves and adores YOU, not just someone you love and adore. Loving someone who doesn't love us back is one of our ways of Self Denial. This is 'self denial' that we are sowing, so it bodes for 'self denial' in the reaping. Ohhhh, I'm so happy you stopped it!


Grace - The ads pay out when you reach $100. I've checked my performance so far and according to my calculations I'm due for a payout by Christmas 2009! Since my ads aren't exactly in-your-face, I'm actually quite pleased about this. Perhaps I can buy some Christmas lights for the blog...

Thanks for your encouragement! I'm glad you're enjoying this series. I have to admit that I have the same sort of struggles as you do - along with most of the human race, I think. Acceptance comes hard and accepting our feelings is especially hard, because it's all too easy to write yourself off and tell yourself that you've failed: "If I was any good at acceptance, I wouldn't be feeling this in the first place - humph!" That's why it's so important to realize that it's never too late for acceptance. Wherever you are, that's where acceptance starts.

Thanks for sharing with us about your own experience. That's great! It sounds like you now have an empty canvas on which to create something new: whatever glorious thing you wish it to be.


Alexys - The way I see it, our accumulated emotions are what block us from spiritual freedom. We have a natural connection to bliss but it's blocked by all the emotional detritus we've built up over the years. Which is why I think that clearing it away is so vital. This is true on a personal level but also globally. Where would the Middle East be, for instance, without the accumulated emotions of centuries? A much more peaceful place than it is at the moment.

I agree with you totally about expectation. This is a very good way to set ourselves up for non-acceptance. I should know, because I'm doing it to myself all the time. Which means that I end up comparing how things *are* with how they *should* be. Which is totally pointless. Some things are always better. Some things are always worse. Why make comparisons?


Sue Ann - Thanks for your encouragement - and thanks too for pointing out the root problem with those expectations of ours: they usually come from the wrong place.

I'm intrigued by what you say about our emotions being the spiritual link to our intuition. I guess this makes sense, except that for those of us who have yet to clear the accumulated detritus I mentioned in my previous comment, we have to be careful which emotions we listen to. Do they come from the intuition or from the accumulated detritus (what Eckhart Tolle calls 'the pain body')? Once the pain body is cleared, I guess the intuition comes through loud and clear. But until then...? Is it a case of ignoring anything which seems to be coming from fear?

Thanks for your comments!


Must appreciate you for taking into the intricacies of this topic.
What appears very tough is only till the moment of acceptance dawns. When we learn to direct the negative emotions, unpleasant incidents to " who is it who is affected", then the turn begings. All that happening on the surface needs constant reminder to look within and reach the core. remaining in the core, gateway opens up. Breathing technique is indeed an instantaneius connector to the core.
great one indeed Simon!

Liara Covert

Great post, Simon. Many people don't realize that acknowledging the positive in open, conscious ways is also subconsciously acknowledging the negative. Some people have the goal of rising above the impulse to recognize opposites. As we move to frame everything as meaningful experience, we move away from judging or comparing. We don't need it.


Merging point - Thanks for your comment! It's good to know that you clearly experience something similar. As you say, once the moment of true acceptance comes, this process doesn't seem hard any more. It's like you suddenly have a key to turn the lock. And I noticed when I did this yesterday that when the acceptance came, there was a sudden release of tension within my body, as though I had suddenly let go of my *grip* upon the emotion.

You are right, too, to speak of the importance of getting to the *core* of the emotion: not the details of what might have happened but the raw energy which lies behind it all.


Thanks to you too Liara! And when we're in the habit of judging, we *need* stuff to label as 'bad' - it's part of the game! So we end up condemning a large part of our world as 'unworthy' simply out of habit. And then those labels define the world we see...


Here are a few additional tips about using EBT/welcome breath which I couldn't fit into the post:

- As Merging Point mentioned above, you need to get to the core. Make sure you focus on the raw emotion - don't get into any internal dialog about why you might be feeling it.

- When you feel the emotion around you, it may help to imagine a violet flame burning it up. This is something I learned from Sue Ann.

- You may find that the emotion dissolves, only to return again a short while later. This doesn't mean that the technique hasn't worked, just that more of the emotion has now surfaced to be released. Just do the breathing practice again.

Sue Ann Edwards

To Feel is to Sense is to Be Aware. (smiling)

In the West, we have our desire and feeling nature 'damned' for all the 'evil' that we do. While in the East, more often then not we have our desire and feeling nature completely negated. What I dub our 2 choices: numbskulls or numbnuts.

What I did was immerse myself in it. I began to study my desire and feeling nature from the inside, out.

When a feeling of 'overwhelm' would hit me, first thing I'd do is breathe in through my nose and out from my mouth, 3 times. This would center me in as I would admit "there's a button!". Like a *bomb* in my mind field. The next thing to do is diffuse it, like {{Grace}} did and like you guided with the violet flame. There's also another way...

ASK to perceive the experience from a Loving perspective...ASK for an 'enlightened' view. (the view is different in the river, then it is looking down at it from above.

Within 24 hours, usually a lot less time, the 'idea, the perspective, the understanding from the seat of your Soul will make itself known to you.


Thanks, Sue Ann - I'll try that.

GothaX Dark

If I understand you correctly, you are saying the same things I say to my friends for years now, only in less words than you used.
I always said:

"Acceptance is the first step of Redemption."

A couple of years ago I said these thing to my friends only to hear that I'm a strange one with a lot of fantasy. I accepted that they are who they are, and they accepted me as an dreamer.

You talk allot about getting rid of emotions, but that way I would say that it seems that you don't accept that feelings are a part of us.
They motivate us, and negative thought makes us think (although I understand that most people on this earth ignore those feelings.)

I used to be depressed very often, for over years, I accepted those feelings about 5 years ago, and gave it a positive twist by knowing that I could learn from these emotions.
Now I love life to the fullest, cause life is a gift, even in my worst moments I would still say the same. The only thing that bothers me sometime is that people make it harder to see the beauty of life. Just because they are blind or act blind. I guess I should accept that fact, but it makes people more interesting .

I understand fully what you said and I hope a lot of people would learn from your insights.
I would have used some other words, cause no emotion is an unneeded emotion. Like you said, we need to know how it is to be sad, to fully understand effects of happy emotions.

The way you use your anchor, I use my mind.(although I believe we are talking about the same thing in other words)
the power of the mind is allot stronger than allot of people realize. I know you would agree with me. Especially with heavy emotions it is important to stand strong in your shoes.

"...the sea's only gifts are harsh blows and, occasionally, the chance to feel strong. Now, I don't know much about the sea, but I do know that that's the way it is here. And I also know how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong but to feel strong, to measure yourself at least once, to find yourself at least once in the most ancient of human conditions, facing blind, deaf stone alone, with nothing to help you but your own hands and your own head..." - Lord Byron

Although I haven't learned anything I didn't already knew, I am happy to learn that there are more people who are looking for ultimate truth.

You told us the truth about emotions and about how to control emotions in such a way that even negative emotions can be converted to accepted emotion we can learn from. It even compares to "the secret".

I'm not criticizing you at all, cause we all have our own definitions of truth. It was fun too read how some people think the same way about some things although we explain it in our own words.

This truth I already knew, but I'm looking further. Like one of my favorite persons said (and I couldn't say it better)

"Rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness... give me truth."

-Christopher McCandless.(originally from — Henry David Thoreau)

I'm a man of freedom, I like to believe in ultimate freedom. We are what we are, but we have the power to change things just accept knowing that we have that power.

I'm not trying to look smart or something, cause I haven't learn nearly enough to say I know something and I will never stop learning from and about life and emotions. But the thing you talked about was one thing I already knew.
I hope you understand me just as good as I understand you. People would be better of if they at least tried to understand the things the do not understand rather than ignore it or wave it away as if it has no value.

Keep learning of life, and if you are a step closer to the ultimate truth, I hope you'll share your insights with us, your readers.

"Dieing or Bieng killed isn't unnatural...
Living without a purpose is..."

Greetings from a fellow wanderer on the path of truth.



Hi GothaX - It's lovely to hear from you. Yes, I can see that we are both interested in pursuing the truth - and we have both discovered the importance of acceptance.

I agree that emotions are a necessary part of life and you are right to point out that they have a purpose in that they motivate us to take action. (This is important and I missed it out of this post - but then it is a very complex subject!) So ideally, we would feel such emotions, take any necessary action, and then the emotions would dissipate. So the emotions would come and go, like clouds across the sun. Some would go quickly, some would go slowly, but they would all dissipate naturally. The problem (if we want to call it that) is that all too often we suppress the emotions instead of fully feeling them and also fail to take any necessary action. We therefore get *stuck* with the emotions. It is these stuck, suppressed emotions which it seems to me do *not* fulfill any useful purpose. They get in the way of spiritual development and they get in the way of us living our lives. Even so, most (all?) of us have them, and if we are ever going to get rid of them, it is necessary for us to *accept* that we have them. For it is ultimately lack of acceptance which is keeping them stuck. If in doubt, accept. Always accept. That is the *real* 'secret', I think. 'Acceptance is the first step of Redemption'. Yes - I like that. It is very wise.

I hope I shall hear from you again. I notice you have read my latest post, 'Your Perfect Offering'. You may also be interested in the previous post to that, 'Letting Go'.

yoeuy chhung

All conditional dharma are impermance. The question is why impermanence? Because when things conditioned or created there are active action and inactive action (cause and affect) which lead to decay. This decay which lead to unsatifactory, eventually back to four elements (O, H, N, and C). in the sense even these four elements are still conditioned by their electron,...etc. One will not understand the unconditional dharma if one don't penetrate the conditional dharmas.

All unconditional dharmas are uncreated, undying, unoriginated because time has no longer influence upon them when one begin to think of time as space. Unconditional dharma are the resting ground of enlighten consciousness.


Hi Simon,
I've enjoyed reading your Ho'oponopono post & the 'welcome' breath .....interestingly Mansukh ( Patel ,Dru uk Founder) gas a wonderful meditation fir releasing unwanted memories/ emotions called 'The Blue Mist ' meditation .
I look out for it and send a copy to you ..there are interesting parallels.
For me ANY way of connecting with ...what shall I say ... Oneness energy , the divine , cosmic conscious ....any practice which takes me out if my 'small self' reduces the power of ...& sometimes removes completely ...negative thought patterns .
Often though there's that stubborn doubt / fear / anxiety .....
I shall give the '10 words ' another spin !
Thank you!

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  • "The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world. There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor. But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone like us to come along - people who will appreciate our compassion, our encouragement, who will need our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give. Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. It is overwhelming to consider the numerous opportunities there are to make our love felt." - Leo Bascaglia
  • "Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm." - Sir Winston Churchill
  • "My life has been filled with terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened." - Michel de Montaigne
  • "Take any fear. Call it out. Actually make an appointment: I'll meet you face to face to get this settled once and for all at 'such-n-such' time. Tell it you'll even meet it in its own space: a dark room. And you'll find nothing will ever come to meet you..." - Sue Ann Edwards
  • "Your mind is the interference to experiencing the bliss of this moment." - Dr Joe Vitale
  • "A human being is part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. We experience ourselves, our thoughts and feelings as something separate from the rest. A kind of optical delusion of consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from the prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. The true value of a human being is determined by the measure and the sense in which they have obtained liberation from the self. We shall require a substantially new manner of thinking if humanity is to survive." - Albert Einstein


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