Walking The Walk

A couple of weeks ago, my wife Chris and I attended a course at a clinic in London. This was quite an achievement in itself as we'd previously hoped to attend last year but Chris' back went in the shower on the morning of our departure and the trip had to be postponed. We nearly didn't make it again this year, as Chris' back was dodgy again and the weather did its bit by flinging copious amounts of snow in our direction, not least on the very day of our travel. But gritty determination - helped by the grit on our driveway - won through in the end.

After all this effort, it was quite ironic that there was nothing in the substance of the course which I hadn't already written about here at The Secret of Life: namely coming into the moment; NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) and EFT (emotional freedom technique). What was very valuable, however, was the realization that these tools could be used not only for our spiritual development but also to help with our long term health condition: we've both had CFIDS (also known - principally - as ME here in Britain).

Increasingly, in recent years, these and other such techniques are being used to treat CFIDS, the theory being that those of us who have had the condition are prevented from healing because our bodies are stuck in a highly-stressed 'fight or flight' state (known as 'maladaptive stress response'). The suggested aim is to develop the habit of spending most of our time in a more relaxed 'healing state' instead.

I'm occasionally asked if all the spiritual work I've done has helped my physical health as well, and I've always replied with a cheery "no - not really". This has never bothered me very much because I haven't been doing the spiritual work with such an expectation in mind. But I realize now that there may be a very good reason why there hasn't been a physical 'pay-off': because I still have a lot of work to do to integrate such spiritual progress as I have made into my everyday life. I have written on this blog about being 'in the zone', in tune with the universe, and so on, but the truth is that I am only in that sort of state of consciousness for about one or two percent of my time. For the rest of the time, I'm still in the same uneasy relationship with life that I always have been, with an eye out for the next thing likely to go wrong and a pathological desire to please all the people I meet: by no means the most relaxed state of mind to carry around with me.

Or to put it another way: there is a considerable disparity between the beliefs I write about on this blog and those ideas which are fixed at the front of my skull as I go about my life, the two big ones I've lumbered myself with being a) if I'm not careful, something terrible will happen and b) other people's opinion of me is important - neither of which are exactly conducive to peaceful healing.

So I need to really work at this (in a gentle, therapeutic kind of a way :-) ): to allow the ideas I espouse in this blog to penetrate into my subconscious mind so that I carry them with me through my day. I need to integrate them into my life, integration being the term which my friend Sue Ann has used to describe this process. Or to put it another way, I need to walk the walk instead of just talking the talk.

So, this is yet another one of those posts where I say I'll be blogging a bit less in the near future, though you've probably got used to them by now. To judge by past experience, the likelihood is that the blog will plod along in much the same way as it always does, though if I seem to be slacking from time to time, you'll know that I'm doing what I really need to be doing, which is working on myself - I hope you will be kind enough to be patient.

In case anyone is wondering, the London clinic we attended is the Optimum Health Clinic, and as well as the psychology-based approach I mentioned above, they also provide nutritional therapies (aka 'functional medicine') which we also receive. If you have CFIDS/ME yourself and would like more feedback about the clinic, please leave a comment or send me an email (see the email link near the top of the sidebar).

It's interesting, though, that the clinic advocates this kind of approach for CFIDS. They don't market it specifically as a spiritual approach, and it is possible to use the techniques they teach without getting into the spiritual dimension at all, but it's kind of lurking there beneath the surface and there is a spirituality section on the clinic's web site.

I have occasionally come across the idea of CFIDS being linked to spirituality in some way and there do indeed seem to be people with the condition at most of the spirituality events I attend. This is scarcely surprising perhaps, because the 'enforced leisure' which the condition affords provides ample scope for asking such questions as 'who am I?' and 'what is the point of life?', enquiries which might normally be overlooked in the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

More controversially, I've heard it suggested that people become ill with CFIDS because of the spiritual transformation involved in developing a 'light body'. I haven't been convinced by this theory, however, because it seems to me that plenty of other people are undergoing spiritual transformations without any such inconvenience to their health.

But the clinic's approach to CFIDS makes me speculate. I've written before on this blog about the need for the human race to undergo a transformation in consciousness if we are to survive our present difficulties. But how is such a thing to be achieved when the need seems to be so urgent? People talk about something big happening in 2012, but that is only a few years away now. We seem to be running out of time. How is all this transformation supposed to take place?

Perhaps the economic upheaval in the world has come to entice us towards this change in consciousness, and perhaps there are other such uncomfortable incentives waiting in the wings. But perhaps it is also significant that CFIDS/ME seems to be affecting an increasing proportion of the population, and that the ultimate cure for this condition may now prove to be nothing less than spiritual transformation itself. I'm not sure if this is a carrot or a stick, but it's a big enough incentive to walk the walk...

I'm always interested to receive your comments. This platform is sometimes dodgy, so if you have trouble posting a comment, please email me using the link near the top of the sidebar and I'll post it on your behalf.

Comments

[Liara Covert]

Everything you do is preparing you for experiences unforeseen. Regardless of how aware you feel at a given moment, you are only ever grasping fragments of the bigger picture. In light of this, reviewing topics ay conferences you had supposedly learned before is actually inviting you to examine differently. Stop what you are doing or thinking to notice something in between the lines.

[Miruh]

Hi Simon,

I love your honesty in writing in your blog. I think you are doing a great service because there are so many 'Self-help' books and such out there that give pat answers and many people who try them and do not get immediate results feel that they are somehow not doing it right etc. One of my teachers in her kind way always said, "If it was easy for you to be doing that, you would already be doing it, it would not be something you have to be working on." It is because our ego does not want to let go into the new framework, that we have resistance, kicking and screaming...LOL, before we see the change we want, and then it is always a task of vigilance to keep it grounded until it becomes habit.

EFT is great for all physical, mental, emotional and spiritual woes. Also check out something similar that is simpler, http://www.tatlife.com/

Cheers...Miruh

[Simon]

Hi Liara - Thanks for your comment. I feel I've been on a journey of discovery these last few years, piecing together a picture which has seemed to keep changing. As you say, we can only grasp at fragments of the whole, and I think what I'm saying here is that I would like to spend less time searching for a while and spend more of it putting the fragments that I *do* know into action. Searching and questioning is a mind game, and I spend too much time in my mind already!

[Simon]

Hi Miruh - Thank you - it's nice to think I may be helping others by owning up about my resistance to change. As you say, great vigilance is required - and I keep getting distracted. I'm starting to realize that it's really a question of priorities. We're talking about breaking a mold we've been stuck in for years, and that's never going to be easy. I think we have to decide it's our number one priority if we're really going to make the change. Otherwise it's always going to get overlooked amidst the deadlines and other events of our everyday lives.

Many thanks for your comment, Miruh, and for recommending TAT, which I shall check out.

[Liara Covert]

It is always possible to stop asking questions. Zen philosophy invites a person to question until one concludes one has questioned enough. Taoism promotes self-acceptance in ways that encourage you to stop searching perpetually. What also matters is the internal or external nature of your quest. As you stop focusing on time, that concept dissolves and the self reorients the focus on your being.

[Simon]

Thanks Liara. That's right. I feel I've questioned enough. This may change again tomorrow, but for now I yearn to set the quest aside and simply be.

[Robin]

Well Simon - I really do believe that the best way we can help other people is to help ourselves - so you go for it!!

Funny how you went off to your course at around the same time we went to ours - you have visited my Brandon Bays post by now.

I've never been keen on NLP. For example, an NLP technique it to imagine an upsetting thing as a scene in a picture frame, and then makes that picture smaller and smaller, and less colourful - all to make it less important and have less influence on us.

I always thought this was a useless approach, I think we need to sink into these feelings and expand them, and let them wash out of us (to be brief). I was so interested to see Brandon saying in her book that she had to abandon her long-held training in NLP, where they re-framed feelings, and learn to drop right into feelings - in order to heal herself of her huge tumour. I was right! heheh

This is very consistent with my experiences with breathwork (rebirthing) - we sink into the feelings and let them express - in a quiet way, without creating dramas that might actually only be diversions. This clears the repressed memories, which cause illness, out of the cells.

Cheers - Robin

[Simon]

Hi Robin - Thanks for your comment. I agree about the shortcomings of NLP, though I think it has its place. One of its uses is to deal with feelings that have just become a habit. For instance, on one occasion I remember getting depressed about a relationship breakup. A year later, I was still depressed. I should have moved on but feeling down had become a habit. NLP got me out of that by showing me that I had power over the way I was feeling.

Generally speaking though, yes, I think it's better to use other techniques to deal with feelings. At the Optimum Health Clinic, we were taught to use NLP to deal with *thoughts* rather than feelings. Our mind chatter is problematic for two reasons. 1) Because it gets in the way of us experiencing the reality of the present moment, and 2) Because often the thoughts we have tend to generate 'negative' feelings which we then repress, so they add to our stock of accumulated hurt. We were taught to interrupt our mind chatter by coming into the present moment and then using NLP to get into a more positive mental space so that we didn't resume it. This is a simplified description of course, but I think I've given the gist of it.

Most of our *feelings*, however, either come from, or are associated with the accumulated repressed hurt (or 'pain body') we carry around with us. As you suggest, we need to get into these feelings and allow them to express and so be released. They need excising, not the sticking plaster which NLP would provide. Other techniques such as EFT, journey work, breath work, or simple observation are required. It's all about getting into the feelings, not shying away from them.

I hope this makes some sense! Thanks for giving me the opportunity to expand on this, Robin - and I hope you and Frank are still benefiting from your course.

[Robin]

Hi Simon - yes - I think it is certainly very useful to have techniques for dropping certain thoughts - in the workshop a trainer suggested that we keep saying "none of our business' when we start entertaining various thoughts. NLP would certainly have a place there! It's so interesting how we are attracted to the techniques that are going to serve us best - and we don't even know why, always.

Cheers - Robin

[Simon]

"None of our business" sounds like an excellent technique to deal with unhelpful thoughts, Robin. Thanks for that. I'm also reminded of something I've mentioned here before, the Sanskrit word 'netti', meaning 'not this', to help us distinguish the difference between ourselves and the contents of our head.

[Grace]

Hey, Simon :)

I haven't been around too much myself these past few weeks....just popped in today to say "HI!" and see that you'll be pulling back a bit yourself. Good for you! :) Do whatever you need to do.

Simon...this may sound really dorky, but I'm going to say it anyway.

Over the last 7-8 years, I've looked into all sorts of healing 'modalities' as they're called. It seems to me that all of them have some sort of benefit. Now, I'm certainly no expert and honestly, I'm glad my mind isn't filled with all the "STUFF" that is out there becuase it all seems so...complicated...sometimes when I think 'it' is supposed to be so simple, even a small child can understand it.

And me? I LOVE simple. LOL

ANYWAY, I have been the recipient of and the observer to so much truly miraculous healing (physical healing) in my life. And I have to say that every single time - without fail - the healer has been Jesus.

Have you talked to Him lately, Simon? :)

Praying for you....

[Simon]

Hi Grace - Thanks. I appreciate your comment - and your suggestion! I'd like to feel closer to Jesus than I do - I was brought up as a Christian - but there seems to be something in the way somehow. Which is a pity because (especially since I studied the 'apocryphal' Gospel of Thomas) I believe that the original teachings of Jesus were probably not too far from the ideas we talk about on this blog. I'm not sure what's getting in the way. Is it because of some of the things that have been done in the name of Christianity over the years? I'm not sure, and after all it seems unfair to blame such things on Jesus!

I'm not entirely comfortable either with the idea of intercessionary prayer. Not everyone gets what they ask for, so what does that mean? Is there a God up there picking and choosing who is worthy of a response? That's not my vision of things.

Unlike you, I've never witnessed miraculous healing, but I've been lucky enough to experience the (seemingly) miraculous temporary easing of my own symptoms. In both cases, this was associated with acceptance, with giving up the struggle and surrendering to some sort of higher power: some might call it God, but I think of it more in terms of 'what is', (though a loving, responsive 'what is').

My own belief (and it is only 'my' belief, not something I'm trying to put on to others) is that something very similar was probably going on with the healings you talk about. Except in the sense that we are all interconnected, I don't personally think that Jesus did those healings. I believe that the people did it for themselves. There was no God picking and choosing. The people who got healed were those who were truly able to surrender to Jesus. I don't think it mattered exactly who or what they surrendered *to*. It was the surrender itself that mattered: their ability to give up the struggling ego which causes so much dis-ease in us all and 'go with the flow'.

Lest I be seeming to lay blame here on any one who *doesn't* get healed in such circumstances, I feel I should add that such surrender is not at all easy, and that there are probably other complex factors which are also involved. But it is probably also worth adding that Jesus himself gave a wonderful illustration of the power of surrender. What more potent symbol of acceptance could there be than the crucifixion? And what more wonderful illustration that we should trust in 'what is' then the resurrection?

I haven't often touched on religion in this blog (minefield that it can be!) but I think this is a subject I might expand into a post when I get around to it. Thanks for your thought-provoking comment, Grace. I hope all is well with your new grandchild!

[joanne]

Hi Simon,
Interesting that you should mention Jesus. As you're probably aware, scholars are certain really that Jesus as an actual historical man never existed. There is no evidence and the whole Jesus myth is pre-dated by the Egyptians. 'The Pagan Christ' by Tom Harpur is an interesting book. They say that the Jesus story is a symbol of the much deeper truth of the 'Christ' in each of us, the divine imprisoned within matter. Interestingly this is the same concept as the 'Self' in Eastern thought.

So when you say about healing that 'the people did it for themselves' I think you're probably right; and the 'Jesus' they're surrendering to is the 'Christ' or 'Self' in each of us.

[Jane @ Kidzarama]

Hi Simon,

A mutual friend, Robin (http://letsliveforever.net) mentioned that you also have CFS (I've had it for 20yrs), so I thought I'd pop by to say hello.

I quite often go MIA from my own blog because I forget to pace myself. Frustrating, but at least it's not fatal. :)

For some reason, I'd never thought of posting to let people know that I'll be backing off for a while when I feel a bad patch coming on.
Thanks for the idea!

Cheers,
Jane :)

[cardiogirl]

It's very difficult to walk the walk. I do believe bringing the thought to the forefront of your mind is a huge accomplishment.

However, acting upon it is never easy. I find when I write about stuff I am much more relaxed and am speaking the truth because I am not really living through experiences.

I am sitting quietly reflecting. But then you are thrown into certain experiences that require a large degree of patience and faith and that's when it becomes extremely difficult.

As you know we're all a work in progress and I have to say I think you're well on your way. Keep up the good work.

[Marion]

I'm sorry to hear about your troubles, but you know what? All things are exactly what they're meant to be right now.

I have recently been diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I don't experience extreme fatigue, but there is daily pain, which in itself makes brain fog and some tiredness prevalent. I was diagnosed with RA a long time ago, as well...but the truly miraculous thing is that the RA has receded in its destructive path on my bone system. Remission, they say, but I believe my daily conversations with my Higher Power has had something to do with it.

I believe, rather strongly, that I chose this path, before I was born. So what do I have to learn from pain? I don't know, however, I have learned to mostly accept it. It makes it easier to face each day. If I am experiencing extreme pain, so be it. If pain is less on any particular day, hallelujah! And on pain-free days, I will always experience some miraculous thing...as a reward, almost.

I stopped searching for the answer as to why a long time ago. It just is...

Taking some time away from questions about life and how to live it the best way is exactly right. By doing so, I believe reasons will make themselves known to you, when your mind is free from extraneous clutter. All my best to you and your wife!

[Ascension girl]

EFT is a simple, but very effective!
I love it!

[Simon]

Hi Joanne - Good to hear from you again. I won't pretend I've studied the non-existence or otherwise of Jesus in any great detail, but applying Occam's Razor to the problem, it seems to me that since we have these accounts of a great teacher called Jesus, the most likely explanation is that he actually existed. The questions which remain to be explored then concern the extent to which the records which have come down to us accurately reflect his life and teachings.

One of the things which attracted me to the Gospel of Thomas is the circumstantial (by no means conclusive) evidence which suggests that it is a relatively early and first-hand account of Jesus' actual words, some of which also appear in the four gospels and some of which do not. Stories such as the virgin birth and the resurrection may well have been added on retrospectively, but it seems to me that the story of the crucifixion has a power of its own, almost irrespective of whether or not it is true.

I like your final paragraph, Joanne: surrendering to the 'Christ' in each of us. That is a good description of my own understanding of things.

[Simon]

Hi Jane - It's good to hear from you. I've had CFS for about the same time myself. Do check out the Optimum Health Clinic site if you haven't done so. Their free report 'ME in the 21st Century' is worth reading at least. You might also check out the Gupta Programme at www.cfsrecovery.com which is another (cheaper) alternative which promises your money back if you don't improve!

I usually find that my various pronouncements about cutting back on blog posts etc turn out to be inaccurate, though I seem to be sticking quite well to this one so far. I don't have any more posts planned for the immediate future but I'm still here hovering. And of course, now that I've written that, it will probably all change...

[Simon]

Thanks for your encouragement, Cardiogirl. Yes, it's all about that yawning gulf between theory and practice, isn't it? After two and a half years of writing this blog, I think I've got the theory pretty much sussed out. Now there's just the living to do!

As you say, keeping the desire for change at the forefront of the mind is a big step forward. If only I didn't also keep taking those steps back...

[Simon]

Thanks for your good wishes, Marion. Opinions differ, but many people consider fibromyalgia and CFIDS to be closely related, possibly even the same condition but with the emphasis on either pain (fibro) or fatigue (CFIDS).

My best guess about the 'meaning' of pain (and illness in general) is that it provides a wonderful opportunity to accept the present moment, to surrender our will to what is. Sometimes, when all other channels are blocked, such acceptance is the only course open to us. Illness therefore provides a wonderful opportunity for self development - though I suspect the truth is not quite as simplistic as this pat explanation of mine.

[Simon]

Welcome to my blog, Ascension girl! Yes, EFT is astonishingly effective, isn't it? I'm also finding at the moment that simply observing my emotions is effective at releasing them too, though there seems to be more of a knack to that. EFT seems to be automatic.

[thethoughtful]

It is a common trait of ours to be so aware of our philosophies of life when we reflect on and develop them in our own minds (or via a post on one's blog...) yet fail to implement their principles in our own lives. I agree with the opinions here; it is an ongoing struggle to 'walk the talk' each day. The activities of our daily lives sap our energy to do so and cause us to shift our concern away from being who we want to be to focusing more on 'getting by' and doing what needs to be done instead. I find that regularly reinforcing (and developing) my own philosophies by writing and reading about the subject is energizing.

I believe that happiness is born out of 1) a sense of purpose, and 2) relationships with others. Each day is a new opportunity to live out our philosophies and self-actualize. Each day is our new chance.

http://thethoughtful.com

[Simon]

Hi thoughtful one - welcome to my blog! I very much agree with your first paragraph. Daily events do seem to shift our concern away from our best intentions and back on to 'getting by', which is ironic really, because if only we could keep our philosophies and teachings in mind when we're faced with those events, we would be much better equipped to take them in our stride. The trouble is that we tend to slip back into our habitual patterns of reaction. They've been ingrained in us for so long that it isn't easy to break the mold. We need to constantly remind ourselves that there's a different way to be.

I agree that a sense of purpose and relationships with others seem to be an integral part of happiness, but I think that the actual *source* of enduring happiness is awareness of our true nature: actually being alive in the present moment instead of lost in our ego-driven minds. A sense of purpose and interaction with others both encourage us to be in the moment, which may be why they seem to be important. But also, a sense of purpose appears to be an automatic consequence of this natural state of being, so that whatever we're doing naturally seems 'right'.

Many thanks for your stimulating comment.

[AngelBaby]

You are where you are supposed to be at this time on your journey so don't be hard on yourself. We all experience things to help us on our quest to self discovery so this is just more information to help you on your way. I try to just enjoy my journey and learn new things with every step I take because it will never be done. Life is just one great adventure so enjoy.

Love and Blessings,
AngelBaby

[Simon]

Thanks for your encouragement, Angelbaby - you are very wise! The way you describe is the way we should live our lives. Our ultimate purpose is to enjoy the adventure. We don't have to carry around the great burden which so many of us place on our shoulders.

[Liara Covert]

Simon, aligning thoughts, feelings and beliefs is a process. Each huamn being works at his own pace, in his own spatial orientation. As you choose to be happy where you are, nothing else matters.

[gypsy heart]

I tried to comment a while back, and for some reason I could not so I'll try again.

I planned to come back and read all the comments anyway, because this was a very interesting discussion!

I am not very good at expressing myself, so I'll just say I think what AngelBaby and Liara Covert sum it up for me.

I appreciate you and all that come here.

[Simon]

Hi gypsy-heart - I'm sorry you had trouble posting. Thanks for coming back. And I'm glad you enjoyed the comments. Looking back over the time I've been doing this blog, I think they've often been more interesting than the posts! I'm always glad to hear that people read them.

Not good at expressing yourself, you say? I can't go along with you there, gypsy-heart. I think you express yourself very well: in words *and* in images!

[Chris]

You f***ers are ru-tard. Stop feeling sorry for yourselves, get up off your ass, and go out and get a job. This website is the biggest bunch of bullshit I have ever seen. You are like the scientists that decided it would be better to have seedless watermelons than to cure cancer.

[joanne]

Thanks for that feedback, Chris. Although - ru-tard? Is that American? I don't quite get your analogy either. And why bother with a cure for cancer? Shouldn't those f***ers with cancer simply stop feeling sorry for themselves, get up off their mules and get a job?

[Simon]

Thanks for your contribution, too, Joanne - and why can't we have a cure for cancer and seedless watermelons too?

[Elizabet]

Hi
Extremely interesting post & shockingly interesting comments.
To get to my point, I empathise with "there is a considerable disparity between the beliefs I write about on this blog and those ideas which are fixed at the front of my skull as I go about my life". I believe that it is a common thread that links people who know how to help others and in fact spend most of their lives helping others, whether in the written form or actually physically caring etc. etc. Recently my caring for a sibling with mental health issues, husband with cancer and grand children with autism has led to a nervous breakdown. Whilst recovering I have been able to step back and realise what really should be done! The caring will continue with me as part of the mix. I will care for myself as much as others so that I am fit, healthy & happy to continue to help!

[Simon]

Sounds like you've had an important revelation, Elizabet. We do indeed have to learn to include *ourselves* in our circle of compassion - otherwise we may find that we don't have the strength to offer it to anyone else.

As you will have gathered, this blog is on extended holiday, so yours is the first spam-free comment I've had in a while. Thanks for dropping by!